shooing with a gum

How does one introduce a child to "forbidden/taboo" notions. I am not talking about sex education here. We still have some way to go before we get there.
Our 4 yr old gets very little TV time and whatever precious little he gets to watch is typically kiddy, animation stuff - main-stream TV is completely off the hook since we do not watch any TV/videos/movies when he is around. He is not into action figures or anything like that either. Of late though, we hear words from him such as "I will shoo you with a gum". It took as a while before we mapped this to "I will shoot you with a gun". We are guessing he got this from his school friends (who may have elder siblings around). Now, I am not sure what he understands about gun/what happens when someone shoots with it etc..I am not entirely sure how to explain this to him either. While I would want to shield him from such talks for as long as I can, I also don't want him to be ignorant of these concepts and worse learn about these things from his friends for the first time. Would love to know how my readers would talk about these (gun, swords, violence in general) to a active,still-innocent, over-imaginative kid in a healthy manner. 

Many a time, I have come to this space to pen down my thoughts but return blank.
I have observed that typically my thoughts flow uninhibited into words here when what I have to share is something of a negative nature. Maybe because inherently I believe in the "nazar lag jayegi" / "temping fate" concept if I were to share happy thoughts.

Anyways, nothing specific to share today just wanted to write something - so random stuff it is.

Work has been decent for the last couple of months but just about rising from the trough, so expect things will be hot sometime soon :(. M has been perpetually busy with work so haven't been able to go on a outing since June. I know he wont like this comment if he happens to read this but that is the truth. We are planning for a weekend outing to Mendocino coast next weekend but lets see how things work out. Travel bug is biting hard - gotta do something abt it.

Summer this year has been a bliss. M's parents are here with us and Naman's been having a ball of a time with them. It has been nothing but pure joy to watch him bond with them. Be it reading to him or playing "teacher teacher", "pappa/mumma/baby", "fire-fighter" /any other make believe games he comes up with, they are always enthusiastic to be a part of his schemes and they are such fantastic sports too! They are ever willing and patient to answer the gazillion questions he throws at them. Truly, Naman is blessed to have them in his life and so are we. Indeed, every time I spend time with this amazing couple, I glean enough things to fill pages.

Naman continues to be the joy of our lives. He has started taking piano lessons this summer. His teacher tells me that he is doing quite good for his age. He certainly shows interest and great deal of aptitude. He can play "old MacDonald" to perfection and some other music by looking at notes. Music practice sessions at home continue to be a power struggle and inevitably end with him composing a "Let's go to the temple" song with so much seriousness - it has all of us bursting into laughter. This "temple/God loving" trait has come about recently. He even allots a "prayer room for ganapati Jai-Jai chami" in all of his drawings - which typically is a multi-tasking vehicle - something on the lines of  "double-decker fire-truck/ambulance/rocket ship". This vehicle switches from one mode to another at the click of a button. Even his ambitions are on the same lines. If you ask him what he wants to be, his answer these days is "fire-fighter,astronaut, ambulance-driver, construction uncle". Oh, all in all he regales us with his tales and jokes and his teachers at school say that he is a non stop entertainer at school as well. So there, my son is all set to be a joker :D

Came in to work very hungry, mind restless and generally nervous about few things. Logged in and checked e-mails. Read one filled with sweet words, encouraging and positive thoughts (thank you dear Maushi). Immediately felt at peace and my hunger gone. Turns out all I needed was some soul-food. Now I am ready to face a long arduous day.

Perspective

I am where I am because of hard-work.
I am where I am because of lack of self-confidence.

A new start

To my lost friend,

There was a time when we were deemed inseparable. A time when there were no secrets between us, no scope for them. There never was an awkward moment between us. We could read each others' deepest thoughts. Not a decision was taken without discussing first. Friends come and friends go. Not all my friends would be with me forever. I had accepted this fact long ago. But you were the one friend I had counted on keeping with me forever. My adamant mind refused to accept that not having you with me would even be a remote possibility. Life without you was unimaginable to me, you see. You were my best friend and my first one.

Then the time came for us to fly out of our cozy nest. To prepare for the future. Nothing much changed between us. Sure, we met a lot of other folks, made other good friends. But we were still the best of friends.

We moved on. Our actions, our decisions, our destiny brought us to different places in life, inevitably. You remained my best friend. But I sensed a slight aloofness. I pooh poohed all my silly thoughts that we were drifting apart. I consoled myself. Surely mere distance will not impact a lifetime of friendship and trust. Right? Then the day dawned when my fears came true. That moment felt like a bolt of lightning had struck me.That was a tear right in the middle of of our yarn of friendship and trust. I knew that things would never be the same again, EVER. And so it has been. Through the years, we have grown up, leading lives hidden from each other's view. It doesn't have to be so, but it is the truth. We keep in touch but through others.

Those long pauses, awkward silences when we do talk makes me wonder if we are strangers. When I learn that you discuss your problems and seek advice from all and sundry but do not even consider talking to me as an option, it makes me very angry, it hurts me and breaks my heart into a million pieces. But then things may have changed, I may be among the all and sundry now.
What changed? What went wrong?

My feelings towards you are unchanged. I love and care for you just the same way. And I have no doubt in my mind that you do too. I read some place that "Good relationships are like the hands of a clock. Even though they meet each other for a very short time, they stay connected". Come now, let's forget all the past differences and forgive each other for whatever wrong that we may have done. Let's start with a clean slate and work to get back what we have lost. Knowing that we will be there for each other is something that I count among life's choiciest blessings.

Your affectionate friend.

Hawa-Hawaii

Have you ever had that inexplicable, queasy, uncomfortable feeling in your gut? I bet most of us have felt that way one point or another. It feels like your insides are knotted and being twisted every which way. Don't know why, but it happens to me whenever a loved one is traveling on their own. Used to happen when I was young and dad had to go out of town for work. Now, it happens whenever hubby dear is scheduled to fly out of town for work. As a matter of fact, when I meet couples who have traveling jobs, my mind does a hats off and compliments these brave souls.

Well, but it has never happened to me before when I am going out with the family. As it happens, we are all set for a Hawaii vacation starting this Wednesday. Am super duper excited about this, no doubt. But somewhere deep inside, I sense the same unsettling, guttural feeling storming up. I have been prodding myself to come up with a reason for this. I believe that my paranoia in general has increased since being a mom (of course every new thing in my life these days is tied to this fact). Its just that, now, we are responsible for another person who has no clue where or why. All he knows is to trust his parents and follow them with no questions. As long as we are with him, nothing else matters (or so I would like to think). This blinding faith in us is what kills me. It hit me that by venturing out on a vacation of this sort, aren't we risking what we have now? So many what-ifs flooding my mind. So many uncertainties. They are wreaking a havoc in my mind. I don't want all these morbid feelings and want to get back to being excited.

I guess I have to be comforted with what hubby dear usually says before one of his official outings - "If somebody's time is up, it is so. You can't do a single thing to stop it. It can happen when you are driving or even when crossing a road". As simple as that but true enough. Destiny - one word sums it all up. Well, if its any consolation, at least this time we will all be together.
So, note to self: Silly mind, cheer up and please don't ruin this for me.

Culture

I have been meaning to share my thoughts about religion, culture and such. Then, I stumbled on this beautiful post I came across on culture and its nuances. Couldn't have expressed it better myself. The stories cited here bring out the essence of this word beautifully.
I think this word is used loosely and out of context many a time. Culture is such a multi-layered and composite concept, you cannot tie it down to any single attribute like religion, geography, ethnicity. It encompasses all these and yet retains the core essentials/features of a society. Just like how it is not uncommon for a Christian in India to celebrate Diwali. Just like how turkey is a symbol of Thanksgiving for people of any ethnicity, religion living in the US.

I like to think of it as the state-machine of a society, or a neural network of the collective brain of the people making it. Something which evolves over time, reacts to the current conditions (inputs - food, religion, language, climate) by way of imbibing some of them and transitioning to a different state. In this process, the external agents themselves undergo transformation making this input-feedback cycle go on. But these changes take time, should take time. A stable society is one where these transitions happen over reasonably long time and once a new state is attained, the likelihood of transitioning to a previous state is minimal.
Can this state machine ever reset? Well, technically it could. It could unlearn all its transformations and become a closed network. This is tantamount to amnesia of the society. An example that comes to my mind is - when fundamentalists get to the helm of affairs driving the society to such a state where heretofore (learned) values are no more relevant. When such transitions happen often, it results in an unstable network/unstable society.

Say a little prayer

Been reading the depressing news coming in from Somalia. My heart goes out to these children and the mothers. Feel so helpless sitting here. Wish there was some way to help these unfortunate people.
In a way, maybe it is good that these children are left to die rather than live a suffering life of deprivation and disease. Hope and pray that things get better for these people very soon.

PS: Turns out there is some way we can help these victims. Please make your donations here

Follow up

Thanks to you wonderful ladies and co-mommies (to-be)for your insightful comments and suggestions and sorry that I have not been able to reply to them. Figured that a collective reply in the form a follow up post would make more sense and here it is.

Just this last week, hubby had to be out of town for 3 nights. So I was on my own with Naman from 5 to 9 those nights. I did enjoy being with him the whole time. But extending that time to 24*7, hmmm, maybe not that fun. He needs a break from me and I need a break to be "myself". I see that he is perfectly fine to be away from us during the day, in fact he is super thrilled to say hi to nanny in the morning. At the same time, he gets restless and fidgety if his Pappa is even a few minutes late in the evening. Apparently, he has clear expectations and has his daytime schedule sorted out.
Frankly, I do not have the heart to quit my job, not at this point. As Gita pointed, I would miss the excitement and adrenaline rush of meeting deadlines. I would miss socializing on a day-to-day basis. More than anything else, I realize that I do not have the temperament to be a Stay-at-home-mom. Just loving your kid is not enough for this job. I lack enough patience, self-discipline for taking up this. So for now, life goes on as is.

But Ma, come soon!!

Kya kare kya na kare

The battle continues with full vigour in the sublimes of my conscience. It is not actually a battle, neither is it a dilemna of any kind. But it haunts me every single moment - when at work, when watching TV, when cooking, when reading a book or even when I am home and spending time with my baby. It is a full on confrontation with myself - what should I do? Should I be a stay at home mom or take up a part time position or continue with the way it is now? My heart breaks and I suffer death many times over every day when I kiss good-bye to my baby in the morning. It hurts to even think that somebody else actually gets paid to play with him, fondle him and kiss him and I get only a precious few hours with my sweetie pie. My mind hurls back at me: these beautiful moments should be yours. But I am letting them go and for what? Money, career, what is it? Do any of these even matter when it comes to being with my precious?

At this point, my rational mind interrupts: May be true that the need of the hour is to be with your kid but what happens when he starts school or much later when he gets independent? How long can you hold on to him? What would you do then? How hard or easy would it be to find a job to your liking at that point? Or worse, what if I lose the drive or focus to get a job? I would rot! I am not one of those proactive people who end up doing something useful with their free time, I know that and those would not be happy times neither for myself nor for those around me.

My mind is torn on these lines. I am not sure what is the right thing to do anymore. But I have to decide one way or the other and fast or sanity will soon become ancient history.

You said it!

It's been hardly a month since we are back from a month long vacation and I am raring to go on another one. With our 5th wedding anniversary around the corner, we do have a reason to plan for one, albeit a short one! Well, I popped the question to hubby last night (not for the first time). Where do we go? Poor, sleep-deprived dad said thus in a matter of fact manner: Let's take a day off, book a room some place and sleep in the whole day. Hmmm, dunno can't think of a better plan!

I said NO to my baby

When he picked up a brown-blue polka dot pajama today. I told him that was a girly dress and that he can pick up something else he likes but he was not even interested in looking at any other. Maybe he loved the pattern! Anyhow, remembered this when I came across this blog: http://nerdyapplebottom.com/2010/11/02/my-son-is-gay/comment-page-312/#comment-20011 . Feeling guilty about having said no earlier.

As promised, here is the link to Halloween pics and few other shots. Enjoy!
http://picasaweb.google.com/namanms09/1012Months#

Wish you all a very happy Diwali (belated). Hope you had a blast!

Zindagi rocks!!

Don't worry. No similarities with the Sushmita Sen tear-jerker here!! That one had an extra g I think, I am not sure now. Anyways just used that for want of a better title, that's all.

Things have changed quite a bit since my last post.Oh yes, they have. For starters, we are now independent parents!! What I mean by that is - after almost a year of having help around - first my parents, next my in-laws, each for about 5.5 months, we are back to being on our own. Not entirely on our own of course.

- We now have a nanny to look after Naman during the day. She is a 50 odd year old chatty, inherently lazy, Gujarati aunty, one who is ever so ready with tips, advice, news of some kind (weather forecast for the day/week, 10% sale in this store on this item etc kind of news). Of course you cannot expect the same kind of commitment from her as you expect from grand-parents but she does her job reasonably well.

The first few days after my in-laws left were traumatic for everyone at home. Naman was at his clingy, fussy best (or worst). Can't blame the little guy though. He was missing his grand-parents a lot during the day. We resorted to working from home alternate days and on those days, we had to play hide and seek with him to get any work done. It was not fun at all, trust me. It took a while for him (and us) to warm up to auntyji and normalcy to be restored in our lives. Glad to say that we are now a fully functioning unit. One that is heavily routine-based. Our week-day routine looks something like this:
wake up in the morning when Naman wakes up - anywhere between 6:30-7:15. He has his coconut oil massage right after he wakes up. Then it is playtime/book time with dad while mom hurries through making tea, washing Naman's bottles, preparing Naman's breakfast and lunch, our lunch boxes and Naman's milk bottles for the day. This usually takes about 30-45 minutes.
8:00: Breakfast time for Naman. A job in itself. Starts with his dad feeding him, sometime later I take over while hubby has his breakfast and gets ready for the day.
8:20: nanny arrives for the day. 10-15 minutes of chit-chat later, I am forced to remind her the reason why she is here. Then she takes over.
8:45-9:Hubby is ready to leave for the day.
Another 10-15 minutes of cleaning up/finishing touches and I am off to get ready and off to work by 9:30.
Rest of the day Naman is care of Auntyji. I get to watch and hear them through out the day thanks to the nanny cameras (web-cam) we have installed in each of our rooms. Crazy?? Not so much, given that my peace of mind when at work totally, absolutely depends on this.
4:45 pm - Hubby is back from work and Auntyji takes off. Usually, Naman wakes up from his afternoon nap around 5. Hubby then feeds him some snacks. Then they get ready for a walk(weather Gods have been merciful so far) and meet me in the park on my way back from work.We are back home by 6:15. Dad - son play time again. Mom in the kitchen cooking dinner/washing. Hubby's constant complaint is that I don't spend enough time with Naman. He offers to cook/clean while I play with him but I prefer this way. Well, in my defense, I do try to cook in such a way that I don't have to spend more than an hour in the kitchen everyday.
7:30: Family is at the dinner-table.
By 8:15 we are all done. General goofing around till 8:40 or so and then it is Naman's bath time.
By 9:15 Naman says good-night and I am done putting him to sleep by 9:45 or so.

Then its back to office work for about 2 hours with TV running in the background. Our little guy still wakes up once every 2-3 hours in the night. So, we have divided the night into shifts now. Till 2 or 3 am, it is hubby's turn, mine after that. Between us, we manage to get around 5 hours of sleep on an average.

Early on in the parenting game, we realised that maintaining a schedule is one of the key things for ourselves and the baby. Babies thrive on schedules. When they are very young, that is one of the ways they learn to understand time of the day. That and sunlight of course. And of course, schedules go a long way in preserving our sanity as well. Naman now understands the concept of day and night. He knows now that day time he will have Aunty for company and night time it is his pappa and mamma. If one of the week-days, we work from home, he refuses to go to Aunty. His concept of time is screwed up then. We are trying to make him understand weekday/weekend concept. But I don't think he is quite there yet. It is amazing how they learn associations. Well honestly, it is incredibly fun and satisfying to see him grow up. The things we adults take for granted, the most trivial of things - walking, talking, he looks up to us for all these and we are his heroes because we can do all these awesome stuff. However crazy/busy our life has become, however tired we feel at the end of the day, hearing him babble and laugh makes every strain of stress vanish. I know that I am sounding very very corny right now but there are no other words to express what his smile can do to us. It is life-giving.

On another front, I am now back in the weight game - after almost 18 months. Not fun at all :( I am left with around 10 pounds of extra baggage over my pre-pregnancy weight. I am now in a weird size limbo. Maternity clothes are way too loose and pre-pregnancy clothes don't fit. I have not shopped in a while because of this. I had a very healthy pregnancy and was happy that I had my weight in control, totally not giving in to any cravings and binging. Well, I was mentally prepared, you see. But come post-partum period, boy, I was raging-mad hungry all the time - hunger pangs like I never known before, literally 24X7. I was totally unprepared for this hunger storm and was thrown off by it. In my curiosity to find out if my hunger-pangs were abnormal, I learnt that new moms who are nursing actually feel 2x more hungrier than during pregnancy time. And so binge, I did! To my pleasant surprise, I found that I was actually losing a healthy amount of weight even with all the binging, thanks to all the fat being devoured by my little champ. Eat away my baby :) Oh how happy that made me! But alas, after 10 months of post-partum guilt-free binging, I am now back to watching my diet and what not. That sucks! And to top it all, I have developed a major sweet-tooth (pregnancy side-effect) which I find the hardest to control :( Well, as with pretty much everything else, self-discipline is the key and I am confident I will reach my target before the end of the year. Amen!

I think I have rambled on and on. Enough for one post I think, though I do have lots of thoughts and updates to pen.
Oh, by the way, hope you all had a fun-filled Halloween weekend. We had lots of fun. Keep tuned in for some pics of a certain tiger-cub :D

Bye for now!

What would you do?

This happens quite a lot with me. The other day, 2 colleagues (quite senior to me) of mine were discussing a configuration problem at work. They were in the cubicle adjoining to mine and I could hear them quite clearly. It so happened that I had previously worked on a similar issue with successful results. What you have done in this situation? Butt in their conversation and tell them - "Hey guys, you know what I have done this before, allow me to show you how" or would you keep to yourself and think"Oh! that is not a big deal, they will figure it out in no time"? Call me timid or shy or whatever but I just could not get myself to do the former. Well, I have done something on those lines before - but when only the matter of concern is something in which I have a reasonable amount of knowledge and / or expertise not something I have done in passing. Would it have mattered if they were not seniors but my peers? I think so, yes. But that's just me.

A duh! moment

Post dinner, Naman usually slouches on his Grandpa's lap reading books and listening to stories. Last night, the story was - "who will bell the cat":

Once upon a time, there was a cat. It was a menace to the mice living around.......the mice decided to bell the cat......they had to find a wire, so they got it from the net (at this point my mind went - whoa!! net, really? Let me see how he explains this one... ) they had stolen - you know the one which the hunter uses? (Ah! that "net" and I go back to eating my food)........but now they had a bigger problem - who will bell the cat?......Many a times, things are easier said than done.

Story time complete, time to play with amma and pappa now! :)

A letter to my son

My dearest Naman,

Some of these are promises, some advice, but actually, these are just a few thoughts I want to share with you as a mom who is super excited about seeing you grow up into a self-respecting, happy and healthy individual.

- I will never ever raise my hands on you. This is a promise. I loathe with all my heart, those that strike another human being. This detestable action is nothing but the mark of shortcomings of the person inflicting it. There is nothing that a kind word of advice will not do that a slap on your face will accomplish. I firmly believe this. I refuse to believe that beating/hitting is a part of discipline. It is physical abuse, period. If anything, it gives rise to fear. And I want you to grow up to be a young man unbridled with fear of any kind, least of all, fear of your mom. I would want you to take a course of action knowing that you are doing the right thing rather than with the fear of what I, your dad or anybody else would say.

- Respect: Now here is another word which is grossly misunderstood in our Indian culture. In my opinion, respect and love are inseparable emotions. And more importantly, it is ALWAYS 2 sided. Asking questions, answering back, disagreeing with another's (whatever their age may be) point of view - none of these are tantamount to showing disrespect.

- I will strive to never answer any of your questions with - "Because I said so". Logic and reasoning should win the day. Oh! arguments - I believe we will have our share of them. There will be difference in how we see things, more often than not. I will try my best to explain my point of view, listen to yours and promise to correct mine if yours is more reasonable/practical and I would expect the same from you! I can see that this is not always going to be easy - especially for me - but I will give it my best shot.

- I want to be your best friend and confidant.I would want you to think of me whenever you feel the need to share something with somebody. Be it a problem at school/work or a crush or a heart-break - anything at all, you come to me without hesitation and with no fear of being rebuked or reprimanded. That's what I wish our relation to be - best friends.

With lots of love,
Amma.

Bachpan ke din bhi kya din the

Albert Einstein once said "Imagination is more important than knowledge". I don't know about that but it certainly is way more fun. Do you remember the times when your imagination worked over-time giving shape to some kick-ass ideas and concepts? I have a good laugh even now when I look back on the silly ideas of those times.

1. Back in those days when biology and anatomy were still alien words to me, I had formulated a theory on how we grow tall -Here goes: The food we eat travels downwards in our body (of course gravity did not have to do anything with this!). When we have consumed enough and there is no more space, the pressure on our feet enables our body to expand magically as if somebody was pulling us from both ends. Imagine how tall we would have all been!

2. Back in those times when the shape of the world (not earth) was not even a question, my brother and I would "line up" all the countries we knew (thanks to our cricket loving dad). So in our world, Zimbabwe was the "last" country and Australia was the "first" and so on.

3. I discovered this not very long ago. We used to shout "timple" ("ti" as in tie and "mple" as in temple) when we played chase and catch games (joot ata, lock and key etc). This was typically used when somebody needed a break from running. Had no idea what this meant and did not care at that time. Turned out to be an abbreviation for "time please" - time pl.

4. Remember mugging the tables in those kg classes? When the whole class used to chant in one single breath - "one one za one, one two za two....two ten za twenty"...? The "za" like sound there was of no concern to me and in my mind, I associated it with the "=" sign because of the way we write this: 2 x 10 = 20. Learnt later that what we were actually trying to say was "two ones are two... two tens are twenty".

5. ICE PICE - This is another classic. We used to play hide and seek. Folks called it ice-pice and so did I. In reality, it stands for eye-spies :)

I can remember only these many for now, but I am sure there are many more hidden in the crevices of my mind. It was a fun exercise never the less. I like to think that I am not the only one with these many misunderstandings to account for. I tag all the readers of this post to list 5 or more such misconceptions, silliness etc etc you may have had as a kid or even as a grown-up. Unleash your "bachpanapan" and let's have some good laugh!

Cheers!

Bitter truth

All this time, I had faith. Not in the corrupt system but in basic human sense of ethics and morality. I have heard folks complain about trust issues - oh, in India getting this done would take ages, oh, in India you cant dream of doing this without getting duped or bribing or facing zillions of obstacles at every step - but pooh poohed such claims all along, branding the owners of such sentiments as firangi-lovers, paranoids and what not. What was I thinking? What did I base my confidence on? True, I am an Indian, have lived in India for the better part of my life. But am I qualified to comment on or repudiate such claims? Do I have experience in dealing with the "system" out there? The answer is a BIG NO! I will not go into the painful details but I will say this - for the past one month, we have been facing one nightmarish issue after another regarding an investment in Bangalore, right at the last minute. I feel so let down, I have no words for it. I hope I have not misled anyone based on my misplaced confidence.

On a related note, this experience makes me re-consider my whole "we will go back to India" stand. I can mentally prepare for the bad traffic conditions, power-cuts, water problems et al, prior experience prepares you for these things. What scares me is the thought that we would need to start worrying about things we take for granted here - like times when I need gas connection, telephone connection, have electricity issues and other basic necessities. I am not used to fighting with the system for such mundane needs. I am spoiled by how smooth and seamlessly such things get done here, in this part of the world. I have always maintained that there are pros and cons of living in either San Jose or Bangalore, Its just that right now, to my mind, the cons of living in Bangalore seem to outweigh any other parameter big time.

A nostalgic friday

I was at work, trying to get my work done as early as possible and I see this e-mail in my inbox. It was about a picassa album link for VVSHS (my high school) alumni meet photos. Oh good, I can see them later at home, I thought. But no, curiosity got the better of me and I had to see the photos right then. Curiosity about what, you ask? To get a glimpse of my teachers of course. Surely, I did get to see all of my teachers and I have to say this - how well they have aged!! I don't know why but going through those photos made my heart beat faster. Even after all these years - seems like a lifetime now, it is amazing how they have the same impact on you. Seeing them there, blissfully sitting among the students against the hauntingly familiar school yard as the backdrop, I was transported to those good old days. Myriad of emotions gush through me - respect and gratitude for the teachers who have created lasting, indelible memories. These are people I have some of the fondest memories of.
Oh! to go back to those days of arguing with teachers for an extra 1/2 a mark. I remember, our monthly tests had 1/4th total marks (of final exam) for each subject. So math, science, social studies, english and kannada were f0r 25 marks and Sanskrit was for 31.5 (because in the final exam, it was for 125, well not 1/4th exactly). Half the class used to have 30.5 in sanskrit. If by chance you fall in the other half, even if you land a 30, you try your best to find loopholes in the correction (the great AV at his funniest saying "ardha markle en agthada, thogo hogli") and get that 1/2 mark by hook or crook. I remember how I used to suck at drawing India map. This one time our social studies question paper had only 4 questions, each of them needed the map to be drawn. I ended up with 4/25 on that paper and my crying knew no end for days to come. The fact that 11 was the highest was no consolation what so ever. The best part was of course the school timing - 12 pm to 5:30 pm. No need to wake up early in the morning! Saturday though was 7:30 to 11:30 and I ended up bunking most of them ;). I have rattled on and I can go on for pages but I think I will stop here.

Naman's corner: To say that he is a brat is an understatement. The sweet, innocent baby is fast turning out to be a master manipulator. Not yet 6 months, he just has to have his way in everything. He is still trying hard to crawl but I think it will take some time before he gets there. His interest to sit on his own has diminished, he now wants to stand up and pulls himself up all the time. He also tries to move on his butt when we try to make him sit. In short, you spend an hour or 2 handling him and you get a nice work out :) Oh and his dad got him a new friend - "my pal scout". It is basically a toy puppy which can be programmed to talk. It is cute but it cannot pronounce the name Naman. So we chose his nickame as "champ". Scout sings some rhymes, chants "I love you champ" and stuff like that. Naman doesn't get these still, all he wants is the pup's nose and to lick it all over.

What's in a name

Disclaimer: This post is neither a rant nor am I voicing my regret here. Few of my thoughts.
My son's name is Naman Mahesh Siddheshwar. Anything missing here? Nothing, I suppose. To anybody who knows my husband's name, this name - Naman, son of Mahesh Siddheshwar sounds perfectly normal. To me however, the question is more of a why not than a why? Why do we not have mother's name as a part of the child's name. "Father is the head of the family" is a fact of the past, at least in most of the modern families. In today's world of mom-dad equality, why is it that we continue to uphold this practice? I had always imagined that my kid(s) would break away from this naming ritual. Alas, when opportunity presented itself, I succumbed. No pressure, no opposition, just plain chickened out. Fear of what the elders and people in general might say. And so here I am, mom of my husband's son.